Just You Wait…

Motherhood is the great juxtaposition of life. It’s the emotional crossroads where joy and pride in who your teenage children are becoming meets sorrow and pining over the loss of their childhood.

Motherhood is the humbling and constant “letting go” and “moving forward”…whether I want to or not.

When we are the momma of littles, it truly does feel like their hands will be tiny, fat, and dimpled forever. And that their tiny, dimpled, fat hand will always want to be in yours. But they aren’t. And they don’t. Their hands become big and independent of yours.

Such loss!

I no longer am the momma of littles. Rather, I have teenagers…several of them! They are fantastic and inspiring and confusing and are my utmost source of joy and angst.

Such gain!

What feels like only moments ago, they were preschoolers. Chubby, curious, rambunctious, messy preschoolers. Their chief concerns and struggles were loud and sometimes publicly humiliating, but simple. Coming up with silly ways to convince them to eat vegetables, looking for their lost “lovey” for the millionth time, picking them up off the grocery store floor because they went “limp legs” on me…those situations were tiring in their own rights, but not overly complicated.

Now, as teenagers, their concerns and struggles are much deeper. Now they are dealing with big issues such as self-esteem and body image, figuring out what they bring to the table, wondering if the faith they have been brought up in has become their own, and trying to answer every adult’s favorite question of “what do you want to be when you grow up?”

That is quite the leap from the concerns and struggles of a preschooler.

They have made quite the leap from being a preschooler.

As sudden as a lightning flash, over a decade of growth, discipline, tears, memories, and love has passed by. My once-young children are now nearing flight. And as I ponder and wrestle with the hard truth of days gone by, my thoughts return to the phrase that I heard so often as a mother of littles. And if you are currently the mother of littles, I would bet that you hear it, too…

“Just you wait. They’re cute now, but just you wait until they’re teenagers!”

With a buggy full of toddlers and groceries, I found myself on the receiving end of this phrase countless times. I would usually smile, give a half-hearted laugh, and move on.

But, to be honest, I never really liked that phrase. It was a weird mix of compliment and insult, praise and pity, happiness and gloom. And it made me feel like the really sweet days of raising children were soon to be over and that the future would hold nothing but failure, misery and low expectations. That my childrens’ looming adolescence would signal the arrival of a hideous monster that was to emerge out of my once-precious preschooler.

But you know what? Twelve years and several more children later…

I’m. Still. Waiting.

I’m still waiting, because that horrible, wretched creature that the grocery store ladies warned me about never emerged from my now-teenagers. Rather, they have slowly and painfully become even more of who God has designed them to be.

Have they changed? Yes! And so have I!
Have they messed up? Absolutely! And so have I!
Have they been refined? Praise Jesus, yes! And so have I!

The teenage years are NOT ones to wish away, and certainly not ones to dread! In fact, these years are the final ones that we will have with them as we raise them. These years should be our greatest efforts, our final big push, our grand finale. As we parent them through their teenage years, let’s not leave one question unasked, one issue swept under the rug, one encouragement left by the wayside.

And let’s be honest, with a hostile world and their own inner turmoil already at work against them, the last thing our precious teens need is a momma’s unhelpful, faulty preconceived notions about their adolescence.

Our teenage children are our greatest, most blessed work.

And one day soon mommas, we will enjoy our adult children.
Just you wait…

“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.”
3 John 4

• When I’m An Old Lady
• Love To Like Them
• The Five Levels Of A Toddler Meltdown
• Champion Your Kids Rather Than Change Them